“Love Me Tender”
by JT Leroy
I think about you taking me somewhere else. Somewhere were you can tie me up and hang me. I think about getting in your car and driving somewhere. I know we are going some place where you can really punish me. I think about us driving there and feeling like nobody else knows. Folks might just think we’re just friends or Father and son. And while we’re in the car driving we can be any of those things. And I kind of don’t want that to end. I think about getting there and you telling me to take off my clothes. You hardly talk to me. I just know we’re going to go further. You have a bag filled with things. There is a hook and pulleys and I know some of what is coming.
You tell me how I am here only to satisfy you. You tie my hands, tie my feet to a leg spreader. You attach me hands to the hook above me. You put a blindfold on me and a gag. You hoist me into the air.
I am hanging naked, swinging.
I dream of you cutting me, finely with a razor. I dream of you burning me with your cigarette. I’ve watched you drag on so many times. I would like to be hanging there while you smoke, and watch you slowly bring the lit end closer and closer to my flesh. I dream of you whipping me till your arms are tired. This isn’t just something I think sounds good and I couldn’t do or take. I’ve done stuff like this all before. Pushed it really far. The difference is, they never hold me after. They do not care. They didn’t know me, know me emotionally, the way you do. I dream of you hitting me with your hand and fist. I think of you telling me how you need to punish me, discipline me. I think of you letting me know that while I’m visiting you, I can be punished at any time. We could be standing, cooking food and you could suddenly backhand my face. I won’t know when it is coming.
It can all be very gentle and loving. Just like a dream.
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CARA BRUCE is the editor of several erotic anthologies including Best Bisexual Women’s Erotica, Viscera: An Anthology of Bizarre Erotica, and Horny? San Francisco and is the publisher ofEmbraces: Dark Erotica. Her short stories have been published in numerous anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2001, The Unmade Bed, The Oy of Sex, and Best Lesbian Erotica 2000.
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