“LADY CHEEKY’S SEX SATORI” from THE RUMPUS

 

Photo by Gene Reed

Photo by Gene Reed

BY   4/5/13

Orginally appeared on TheRumpus.net  

Tweet sex sites are a many splendored thing, opening doors to fluid identities that are both sexy and risk-free while erecting an emotional firewall to avoid real, personal rejection. My hackles go up whenever I think about technology replacing human touch, but when I met Lady Cheeky and heard her story of seeking and finding passion via tweet sex, I witnessed a brave new world where one woman’s sexuality was accessed in an accelerated way that involved wooing, teasing, and palpable passion.

“Lady Cheeky” is her Anglophile cybersex identity name, where she is a servant/vessel/wench. We met on the floor at Marilyn Friedman’s essay writing workshop, which I signed up for during a dark time. After dozens of agent rejections flooded my inbox for over a year, I longed to sit in a room with other writers again, hoping to inject my writing with joy by learning new literary tricks from veteran journalist, Taffy Brodesser-Akner. Our assignment was to tell the group what our essay was about and then say one more line declaring what our essay was “really” about.

Lady Cheeky’s wavy, Lucille Ball hair matched her bright red lips. Her curves punched out of her ’40s frock, as she told a hilarious topsy-turvy tale about role-playing on a True Blood-themed, Twitter-based direct message and tweet stream, which led her to start her smart and sexy websites where she met “Lord Byron,” hired a P.I. to check another lover out, and divorced her husband. She also overcame a rare sexual disorder; started a popular sensual images blog; began writing and publishing real-life erotica based on her new, passion-filled experiences; is in the process of working on a memoir; has a new story in Rachel Kramer Bussel’s upcoming erotica anthology, The Big Book of Orgasm; and is currently speaking about body image and sensuality, as well as integrative sensuality.

Lady Cheeky’s story beneath the story was flesh and bone ache deriving from a phantom limb that was pummeled awake by HBO’s True Blood series. I wanted to know more about how True Blood was the springboard to becoming a sexually actualized woman, capable and deserving of passion.

… To read the rest of the interview, CLICK HERE:logo-sm

*** EXCLUSIVE *** Sexy Excerpt From “In The Office” by Alyssa Halford

In_the_Office_Cover “Can you hold my sweater for me?” she whispers. “It’s a bit warm in here.”

I hadn’t noticed the sweater. She arranges it on my lap. Then the penny drops.

“There,” she says. “Comfortable?”

“Very,” I whisper back. Am I reading this right? There is no other way. I can feel my heart start to pound as I see her slim hand slide under the covering.

“Allow me,” she whispers. She finds my zipper and tugs. I look around quickly to see if anyone has heard but all eyes and ears are focussed on the front.  Some bullshit presentation about avoiding your “triggers”. Too late for me. I help her as discreetly as I can, pulling up on the fly so she can unzip me. Jeans open, warm hand and long fingers reach into my boxer briefs and expertly circle my cock. She moves a bit to adjust her arm’s angle then squeezes. Squeezes oh-so-gently, and then waits. I don’t take my eyes from the screen.

And it begins, the tortuous grasp, her beautiful hand on my shaft stroking up and down slowly, achingly. Up to the head to rub and press just the right spot, then a quick subtle twist and back down. Her hand is lotioned with something floral and tantalizing. Not overpowering, just right. My cock is standing full at attention now and aching to be free of my jeans. There is no way we can do that, I realize. I glance quickly out the corner of my eye and see a soft smile on her beautiful face. She turns slightly to wink quickly before looking back to the screen. A dimple. A dimple in her beautiful face tells me she’s enjoying this. She crosses her legs and closes her eyes a moment. Oh yes, she’s enjoying this too. God I can’t wait to fuck her.

Her hand works faster, bringing me close to my breaking point. Up, down, twist, pressure under the tip of the head. She can’t reach inside my pants more so I can only imagine what it would be like to have her hand have free rein over my cock and balls. Pulling, squeezing, agonizing fluid motions, no hesitation as she works my dick and balls til I come all over her tits. Or ass. Anywhere.

alyssa_halford-CUBEAbout the Author: Alyssa Halford

A male-focused author.  Women may enjoy too, of course; but it seems men prefer.

I write erotica and romance, including light BDSM, public sex, and casual encounters. I do not write hardcore BDSM or torture. I err on the side of Eros, not Thanatos.

I’m a big fan of HEA and HFN, whenever I do write romance.

In my spare time I suffer greatly as an actuary, but manage to find time to take long hot bubble baths with my sexy, nubile girlfriends. We giggle, kiss, paddle each other’s bums and then I write about it.

I like koalas.

Facebook:    https://www.facebook.com/pages/Alyssa-Halford-Author

Twitter:      @AlyssaHalford

Site:    http://www.alyssahalford.com

Buy Links: http://www.alyssahalford.com/shoppe.html

Bawdy Storytelling LA – Tomorrow, March 27th at El Cid in Silverlake!

555065_615609988453364_1540533467_n

Bawdy Storytelling presents

‘The Unlikeliest Places’

Featuring:

- Sex Educator & Porn Icon Nina Hartley
- Bravo’s Miss Advised & Sex with Emily’s Emily Morse
- Fleshbot‘s Senior Erotic Consultant & the brains behind GramPonante.comGram Ponante
- Music by The Turgidaires
- And YOU! This is part curated Bawdy Storytelling, part BawdySlam: share your 5 minute story for prizes & braggin’ rights

Giveaways from Vixen Creations (“The Cadillac of Cock”)
BawdySlam Grand Prize Package from Screaming O Adult Novelties (Yes, the same prizes found in the gift bags at the Oscars!)

Ever have that moment where you wake up in a small county jail without your shoelaces, belt, or dignity? Yeah, me neither. How about some random bed where you try to remember where your pants are, where the handcuff key is, and why your ass hurts? Me neither. But have you ever wanted to hear stories from people who have, though? Yeah, me too!

This month, Bawdy Storytelling presents ‘The Unlikeliest Places’ — a firm and probing exploration into sexploration … LA style. From hopping a fence to getting drunk in a hospital to good ol’ stickin’ it where it don’t normally fit, come hear stories about boldly going where most men and women just shouldn’t, couldn’t, and in some states dictated by law, MUST NOT go.

This show will be a mix of renowned sex-positive celebrities for the curated portion of our show, followed by BawdySlam (where people just like you take to the Bawdy stage and share personal and intimate adventures for prizes and the title of Dirtiest Storyteller in LA). Bawdy’s award-winning take on sex and storytelling has made it not only a “don’t miss” event in the cities we’ve already conquered, but it serves as a gathering of the bold, the beautiful, and (if our fan mail is to be believed) an awesome first date destination. Each themed evening of true dirty stories features tales of carnal wins and epic fails with no scripts, no nets, and no holds barred. You may even go home with a few new tricks for your boudoir arsenal!

As the great American poet Iggy Pop once said, “You know I’ve had it in the ear before…” Come to the gorgeous El Cid to enjoy tapas, drinks (my fave are the drinks made with this incredible homemade jam!), flirting and stories that would make little Jimmy Osterberg blush!

Taking place at the historic El Cid, a treasured Silver Lake Landmark. It’s under new management, and has a delicious new menu under the direction of renowned chef Olivia Hernandez. Bawdy’s first LA show at El Cid sold out fast so get your tickets NOW – we want you there!

DOORS AT 7:30 – SHOW AT 8:30 PM

images-3

4212 SUNSET BLVD LA 90029

(323) 668-0318

TICKETS $12 IN ADVANCE AT:

HTTP://BAWDYUNLIKELIESTLA.EVENTBRITE.COM/

ONLINE TICKET SALES END AT 5:30 DAY OF SHOW & WILL BE $15 (CASH) AT THE DOOR (SPACE PERMITTING).

 

Performer Bios:

imagesNina Hartley (@Ninaland) is a pioneering feminist sex worker, using her body in the service of promoting a sexually sane and literate society. She is thrilled to see a new generation of sex-positive performer/activists take its space and spread the good news about sex. For the past thirty years her rock-solid commitment to the importance of sexual autonomy has fueled Nina Hartley’s career in adult entertainment. As a performer, director, writer, educator, public speaker, and feminist thinker for all, no matter their orientation, she’s traveled the world to deliver her message. She believes that sexual freedom is a fundamental human right and welcomes the new social media opportunities for spreading her message of knowledge and empowerment to the widest number of people. She’s the author of, “Nina Hartley’s Guide to Total Sex,” from Avery Press. Putting to use her B.S. degree in nursing, she and her husband, I.S. Levine, have produced the million-selling sex-ed video series collectively known as “The Nina Hartley Guides,” from Adam & Eve, currently in its 38th episode. Still active in front of the camera, she and her husband live in Los Angeles.

images-1Emily Morse (@SexWithEmily) is a sex & relationship expert, author, talk show host & Bravo TV star. She is the host of Sex With Emily, a radio show and podcast about sex, relationships and everything in between. Listen to the show on demand at www.SexWithEmily.com , through iTunes on Friday nights on Sirius/XM Satellite radio.

 

dandyGram Ponante (@gramponante) has been America’s Beloved Porn Journalist for most of this century, providing much-needed insight on the adult industry in the San Fernando Valley—the region’s greatest natural resource—at www.GramPonante.com, Fleshbot, Hustler, and dozens of classy magazines for Gentlemen and discerning Ladies. His “A Porn Valley Odyssey: Making The Facts of Life XXX” is a betterselling Amazon eBook.

WATCH a sample of Bawdy Storytelling HERE

This week’s LA WEEKLY loves BAWDY!

156093_10151581175855030_527787442_n

Surviving Stretch Marks

 

feb 22 art and motherhoodBy Dr. Megan Stubbs, EdD, ACS

I just recently returned from a vacation in Japan and had the wonderful opportunity to visit my first onsen. Onsen is the Japanese word for hot spring. Being a volcanic country, this provides the perfect environment for there to be many located around Japan. These public bathing facilities are great for the countries tourism, but moreover, just a great place to relax.

While using the onsen, you are not allowed to wear any clothing. This is quite the liberating experience, especially when you go with family members. Now obviously it isn’t polite to stare considering that everyone is naked, but you’re bound to look around.

While I was submerged in the heavenly hot and mineral rich water, I took in the scene around me. There were around 100 plus women in the facility at the time and their ages varied from toddlers to those who were well into their 80’s. Something struck me as very peculiar as I was surveying all of the bodies. Despite their lean and lithe build, I noticed that almost every woman had stretch marks. That was the point where it really hit me that stretch marks can happen to anyone.

Stretch marks are a type of scarring that can happen when there is rapid growth and stretching of the skin. They often occur during puberty, pregnancy, and can even happen during muscle building. The marks can appear anywhere on the body, but are usually found in areas where there are high amounts of fat stored, like the abdomen, breasts, arms, thighs, hips, and buttocks.

Stretch marks are commonly a darker, reddish color, which later fade into a lighter hue over time. The dark color is from the dermis (the inner layer of skin) being torn and exposing the blood vessels in the skin. As the tears heal, the stretch marks return to a color similar to the surrounding skin. They pose no health risks but can often cause some mixed feelings to those who have them.

The largest sexual organ on our body is our skin. And when there are perceived flaws on it, it can be the source for many negative thoughts. The prevalence, let alone the normalcy, of stretch marks should be known and in no way are an indication of damaged goods. If you’re still stressing over the stretch marks, there are topical creams and laser procedures that you can undergo. The results are varied, and in some cases, can be very expensive.

Please consider embracing yourself for all that you are. You are more than the sum of your scars and imperfections. More love and less loathing. It starts with you. If you can’t love yourself, how is anyone else going to? Beauty is more than skin deep, so don’t let some scars get you down. And when it comes to sex, everything is OK here.

 

MeStripeDressDr. Megan is a Grand Rapids based Sexologist. She loves the media and currently appears on West Michigan’s morning television show, Take Five & Company, on WZZM 13, as a sexuality and relationship expert and also co-hosts the nighttime radio show, Holmes and the FreakShow, on 104.5 WSNX/Grand Rapids, 92-5 KISS FM/Toledo & on iHeartRadio worldwide. She also just started a NEW weekly podcast called ‘Sex and Sports’ on ESPN 96.1. When not sharing her voice across the airwaves, Dr. Megan writes articles for various online outlets and hosts workshops locally and around the country. Check her out at www.SexologistMegan.com. Follow her on Twitter @SexologistMegan and like her on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/EverythingIsOKHere.

Inside Her Sex: Documentary Looking For Subjects

cropped-logo-mast-wordpressnewA couple of months ago I was filmed for an upcoming documentary by Canadian filmmaker, Sheona McDonald that will be released next year. The working title is Inside Her Sex and explores how women’s sexuality is influenced by pornography and technology. It’s a huge subject but she’s interested in keeping it broad for now because the avenues are great and the people she’s  are meeting fantastic.
Sheona is always interested in talking to people who can provide insight on the subject  – authors, filmmakers, educators, activists, explorers, etc. - and is always up for suggestions on things to read and look at.
She is also interested in talking to women who are embarking, or have embarked on a significant journey of sexual discovery (whatever this may be) that they are willing to share. So, if you are interested or might know someone who is, please feel free to pass this request on with her contact info (below).

 

Sheona McDonald

sheona@dimestore.org

www.dimestore.ca

 

Check out their latest film:
www.cbc.ca/whendreamstakeflight

and also …

www.capturingashortlife.com
www.whendreamstakeflight.com